Are You A Waste of Time?

Recently I got a haircut. And, as you might expect, nothing particularly surprising happened. But, as I was paying, the hairdresser asked a question. “Do you have 50p by any chance?” Immediately I sprang into action. I searched rapidly, poring through my wallet, tipping coins into my hand and picking out the right change for…

Is The Whole World In Our Heads?

We’ve Got The Whole World (In Our Heads), We’ve Got The Whole Wide World (In Our Heads), We’ve Got The Whole World (In Our Heads), We’ve Got The Whole World In Our Heads. This homage to an old hymn gets weird rapidly after verse one, so let’s end it there. Question: Is the whole world…

Lies, Damn Lies, and Oh God Why All The Lies: Part One

One night at university, my friends and I came up with a game. Each of us would tell one lie, and whoever convinced the most people to believe it would win.
I forget what lie everybody else told. But mine went on to become legendary. It was this…

The Little Virus Who Fell In Love

There once was a virus who fell in love with its host. It drifted around in their bloodstream, dreamily content with its lot in life. Every moment was a joy. It was physically joined with its true love, and it had never wanted anything more. One day, after a spate of joyous multiplying, the virus…